Where is the Love?

"Somewhere along the line, we exchanged "They will know you are Christians by your love" for "They will know you are Christians by what you hate". Think about that one for a while and you'll see the sad truth there which society around us has known for a while now. How many times in the past few years have you heard anyone say "You must be a Christian because of your loving actions toward others"? Instead, what we hear more is the mocking "you must be a Christian because you hate homosexual marriage/abortion/Muslims/whatever". So we are now identified not by our love as Jesus told us to be, but by what we DON'T love. It's a sobering thought."

-Darcy

"So, how is work? How do you like their new 'gay' policy? lol," an old acquaintance texted me a few months ago.
"haha, their 'gay' policy?" I replied, bracing myself.
"Ya, they said they would support any bill that said that marriage was not just one man and one woman."
I read it, and shook my head. Another text came through: "It made me never want to go there again."
The ignorance truly saddened me. I do care about this person. I decided to reply with a small thought.
"If you really think about it though, marriage must be really weak if whoever else decides to marry each other affects someone else's marriage. Basically, what's it gonna do to my parents' marriage if Tom and Ed decide to marry? Nothing. I guess my opinion is just that it's not an attack on marriage or anything. And I'm sure we differ there."
"Well the bible is pretty clear about it."
This hurts. I don't... I can't stomach that reply any more. Haven't been able to for the longest time. Using the Bible as the end-all weapon.
"It's clear that gays are attacking other marriages?"
"Not about that they are attacking us but that it is wrong."
Another message popped up: "The death penalty is pretty strong."
That one made me want to cry. The death penalty. It reverberated through my mind.
I wasn't even angry. Just truly saddened. And jolted, yet at the same time not surprised in the least.
"Would you institute the death penalty for gays? As soon as we start using one religion to govern the land, that opens the door for people to suppress and/or punish our religion and beliefs. That is exactly why America was born-- so that everyone could do what they want freely, so long as it doesn't harm others. You can disagree with other people, and that's okay. But I don't want anyone telling me what I can and can't believe, or what I can and can't do by law, if it doesn't affect or harm others."
The person replied, "You are right American was born for freedom of religion. We obviously differ in political and biblical views."
"Freedom of religion for everyone, that's the key," I pounded away on my qwerty board. "If you can say that you're (the general sense of "you") more right and can make everyone follow your standards, what's to stop someone else from doing the same to you?
Murder, stealing, etc, these are things that harm other people. That's what our American laws are here for-- to protect people from harm. Gays don't harm other people.
My Biblical view is to do as Jesus did."

We wrapped up the conversation. The person closed, "I love all people. I minister to many sinners (including gays) and pray I can reach them for Christ!"

I've written a few times about the "Wow, I was you, once" feeling.

That interaction was the first real time I had made my opinion on the subject known to anyone outside my family.

But that's not even what I want this post to be about.

My biggest question is:

Where is the love?
Christians really have, as a general population, exchanged love for hate without even realizing it.

To "love" is to say, "You are disgusting. You are filthy. You are absolutely worthless. You are not lovable. You deserve hell."

We've been taught that these kinds of speech and actions are "loving," despite every other definition of love that we know and feel.

We've been taught to hate ourselves.

We've been told that we are disgusting, filthy, maggoty, Gollum creatures.
We've been told that we need to live remembering this daily.
We beat up on ourselves.
We are to crawl around on our hands and knees-- disgusting for who we are, for what we feel, for what we think.
We're taught to deny ourselves real happiness.
Everything about us is wrong: our feelings, our thoughts, our wants and desires--simply because they are our own.
It's evil. It's "fleshly."

How can we love others as we love ourselves, if we cannot love ourselves?
If we cannot celebrate how God created each of us, if we have to stamp out every "unapproved" (by the "correct" authorities) feeling, thought, aspect of our personalities, if we are not allowed to be happy, how can we project anything other than negative sentiments on to the rest of the world?

We want to give the same message we give to ourselves:
"God hates that."

It's a perverted definition of love. Try as you may to get around it, you cannot say that treating a person (including yourself!) this way is "loving" at all.

Even according to this popular definition, that you might recognize:

Love is patient, love is kind.
It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.
It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking,
it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.
Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.
It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

That doesn't sound like a prescription for telling a person that they're utterly horrible.

It's hard for me to bring to Bible into anything anymore, because I'm verrry well aware that a person can make it say whatever they would like. And even a beautiful definition of love might be re-worked to fit the "proper" mindset.

Another thing Christians hide behind is this sentiment: "Well, Jesus did say the world would hate us. They are the one that won't tolerate us."

Actually, no, that's not the case. As hypocritical as it is, since I would have used a similar line, I lose a lot of respect for people who feel that way. Why play the victim?
All the world wants from us is respect and decency.
Because Christians who go around telling everyone else that they are horrible, are being just the opposite-- disrespectful and indecent.
And that does degenerate quite quickly into hate.
Hate that spurs a sixteen year old boy, whose family are very strong Christians, to comment on a photo featuring a message about gay rights, "God hates faggots."

"Love the sinner, hate the sin," they say.

I call bullshit.

It's like saying... "Love the pet, hate the species," or something. Ha. Anybody have a better analogy?

The funny thing is, Jesus didn't say anything like that. He just said to love.
To befriend the tax collectors.
To protect the prostitutes.
To love them all.


I've had this playing on a loop almost the whole time I wrote this-- you know, for inspiration.



At one point, I was overcome by the beat and had to have a short dance session. By myself. 
"Oh no! Amy, don't make me dance with you! No! Why did I have to come upstairs at this moment!" yelped my 12 year old brother. "I just wanted to get a drink!"
But the lyrics are pretty powerful, as well.

♩ ♪ ♫ ♬ 
What's wrong with the world, mama
People livin' like they ain't got no mamas
I think the whole world addicted to the drama
Only attracted to things that'll bring you trauma

Overseas, yeah, we try to stop terrorism
But we still got terrorists here livin'
In the USA, the big CIA
The Bloods and The Crips and the KKK

But if you only have love for your own race
Then you only leave space to discriminate
And to discriminate only generates hate
And when you hate then you're bound to get irate, yeah

Madness is what you demonstrate
And that's exactly how anger works and operates
Man, you gotta have love just to set it straight
Take control of your mind and meditate
Let your soul gravitate to the love, y'all, y'all

People killin', people dyin'
Children hurt and you hear them cryin'
Can you practice what you preach
And would you turn the other cheek

Father, Father, Father help us
Send some guidance from above
'Cause people got me, got me questionin'
Where is the love (Love)

Where is the love (The love)
Where is the love (The love)
Where is the love, the love, the love

It just ain't the same, always unchanged
New days are strange, is the world insane
If love and peace are so strong
Why are there pieces of love that don't belong

Nations droppin' bombs
Chemical gasses fillin' lungs of little ones
With ongoin' sufferin' as the youth die young
So ask yourself is the lovin' really gone

So I could ask myself really what is goin' wrong
In this world that we livin' in people keep on givin' in
Makin' wrong decisions, only visions of them dividends
Not respectin' each other, deny thy brother
A war is goin' on but the reason's undercover

The truth is kept secret, it's swept under the rug
If you never know truth then you never know love
Where's the love, y'all, come on (I don't know)
Where's the truth, y'all, come on (I don't know)
Where's the love, y'all

People killin', people dyin'
Children hurt and you hear them cryin'
Can you practice what you preach
And would you turn the other cheek

Father, Father, Father help us
Send some guidance from above
'Cause people got me, got me questionin'
Where is the love (Love)

Where is the love (The love)?
Where is the love (The love)?
Where is the love, the love, the love?

I feel the weight of the world on my shoulder
As I'm gettin' older, y'all, people gets colder
Most of us only care about money makin'
Selfishness got us followin' our wrong direction

Wrong information always shown by the media
Negative images is the main criteria
Infecting the young minds faster than bacteria
Kids wanna act like what they see in the cinema

Yo', what ever happened to the values of humanity
Whatever happened to the fairness in equality
Instead of spreading love we're spreading animosity
Lack of understanding, leading us away from unity

That's the reason why sometimes I'm feelin' under
That's the reason why sometimes I'm feelin' down
There's no wonder why sometimes I'm feelin' under
Gotta keep my faith alive till love is found
Now ask yourself

Where is the love?
Where is the love?
Where is the love?
Where is the love?

Father, Father, Father, help us
Send some guidance from above
'Cause people got me, got me questionin'
Where is the love?